As our camera's pan around, we see Nikolai Dorkoff and the Dork Knight lying unconscious at ringside. It's obvious that the Technicians have just wrestled these two, and clearly put their lights out. But we're not interested in what has happened, we're interested in what will happen. And so be it, the truth about Epic.
M: Man, I feel so much better after that.
E: Me too. Felt good to kick somebody's ass for once... somebody that was worthwhile I mean. Not some nobody like Viper or Jimmy the Gent.
M: Well speak o' the devil.
Both wrestlers turn their attention the camera crew. The Mechanic grins just before he takes a sip of water, then begins the ever fateful promo.
M: Ya know Gent, Viper... it's one thing to wrestle jobbers as practice, but it's another to actually pay them to job to you. Not only have you just proven yourselves as complete crap as a tag team- you just let the whole world witness that you could barely measure up to the very jobbers you personally paid to lose. I mean what was up with that Gorilla Press Slam Viper took right off the bat?
E: Yeah, and that Sit down face slam that almost cost you two the match, not even 2 minutes into it?
M: And let's not forget that inverted back breaker from Dude.
E: Or how Dude struggled out of that running neckbreaker because Gent was too weak to keep the move going.
M: And let's definitely not forget that exploder suplex on Gent... I'm sure you remember- the one that damn near knocked you out cold?
E: See guys, that's the difference between us. We actually know what the term teamwork means- whereas you... well, you just don't have a clue. During the entire time we were watching that crap, we could tell that both you wanted the glory and that neither of you were willing to sacrifice it for the team.
M: That's what makes us better than you. We don't care who gets the pin, all that matters is that the win goes to who it rightfully belongs to- us. And come Epic, what really matters is that the Tag Titles stay where they belong- to us. As little as they may matter to the rest of the BLPW superstars, the fact remains that the holders of the Tag Titles are champions.
E: And you guys... well, you're just kinda here, aren't ya? You don't really know what you're doing, you just do it because you were told to.
M: It's not that we doubt your abilities as a team. I'm sure you guys made a great team back in Jobber Championship Wrestling or wherever it is that you came from. It's just that, you aren't quite ready to face the two guys that could literally cause you to break down.
E: We aren't called the Technicians for nothing. It's not some stupid name we came up with off the top of our heads.
M: Uhm... yes it is.
E: Shut up! I'm trying to make a point here!
M: Oh, sorry.
E: Anyway... dammit, I forgot what I was saying!
M: Allow me then.
Gent, Viper, I think we've made it clear to you by now. The Tag Titles are staying with us. There's nothing you can do about it, and there's nothing you ever will be able to do about it. If you choose think otherwise, then you're only fooling yourselves because the rest of the world knows where the true talent lies- and it's not in you two. We have built our careers making sure that if nothing else, we would never be defeated as a team. And as much as we know that day will come, it's just not coming at Epic.
E: Oh sure, go ahead, try your hardest. Try your best. Cheat if need be- but when it's all said and done, and the cards have been dealt, you will have been...
M & E: TECHNICALLY DESTROYED!!!
The Mechanic and the Electrician get off the ring apron and begin walking up the ramp.
M: I don't know about you, but I'm goin' to visit Kendra.
E: Yeah, me too.
M: You can't visit Kendra! She's mine f*cker!
The scene fades to black as the two disappear behind the curtains.